Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
