i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
