You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
