One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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