To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Randomize
