Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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