"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
