i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
