how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
