Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize