I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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