oh god the rape fog is back!
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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