About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
