Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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