One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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