Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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