Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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