The maid of honor just puked.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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