Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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