I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
We got so high we made milksteak
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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