just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
