What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
