The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
