3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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