Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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