his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
