i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
