Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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