Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
