they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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