I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Randomize