whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
