that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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