alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
