Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Randomize
