Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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