he shaved USA in his pubs
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
