Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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