erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
