I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
