could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
you would pick up someone in the library
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
