Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize