Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize