addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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