we have pet lesbian snakes
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I think I died a long time ago.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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