Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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