Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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