Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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