Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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