I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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